A Single Rose For My Single Lady

Pauline was a single lady for many years. She was a very smart lady because she was able to complete her College Degree and landed a decent job in a Financial Institution somewhere in North America.

Pauline was a Immigrant from Africa and was at the same time taking care of her parents back home by sending them money using Western Union.

I had an opportunity to share her experience about life. Like so many Immigrants, she hated the idea of taking care of herself first. The only problem was that every time she had an opportunity to save $100 from her monthly bills, she had to send it back home, not realizing that her parents, brothers and sisters will always ask for more.

The concept was that all the people who had a chance to know her were thinking that in North America or Europe, life was easier and people could harvest money from the “trees”.

Now you may be thinking that Pauline was interested in money or that we are talking about money here.

As she confided to me, her biggest concern was that she was still single at age 30. She felt that she was missing something very important in her life. A partner would bring more peace, security and increase her self confidence.

Pauline was a problem solver but couldn’t figure out how to solve that one crucial problem. Pauline was a very kind, caring and beautiful lady. No one in her family could have imagined that she was still single without her wish.

Parents and relative were delighted to see a daughter like Pauline building a family and having children to immortalize them. They even used to frighten their children that if they died before seeing grand children, they would come back to hunt their own children.

So many guys approached Pauline before but she did not feel attracted to any of them.  In the same way, she told me that she loved a few guys in her life but, according to the tradition, couldn’t tell them what she felt in her heart. Was it also by fear of rejection?

The fact is that the attraction stayed on one side and kept switching sides but never came from both sides at the same time. It was not her fault and it was not her friends’ fault. May be they were not meant to be together.

I truly loved so many girls in my life but they escaped and joined guys who later mistreated them. On the other hand, many girls loved me but I wasn’t interested. Did I know why?

There were instances where I would go back to them later to find out that they are not interested in me anymore. Love can really be strange!

When I think about this, I can understand better what Pauline was describing. The only difference was that she felt it was catastrophic while I felt it was part of life.

Even after I got married, I felt that a human being can never be completed by another. Either he/she is complete or not. Your happiness, Pauline’s happiness won’t come from her marriage or the amount of money she will be able to accumulate.

Pauline’s happiness will come from the way she thinks about herself and her environment. It will also come from the actions and reactions she choses to take about her environment.

At the end of our conversation, I told Pauline to watch her thoughts. What she was afraid of was what she kept getting from the Universe. I asked her to focus on what she wanted and work for it instead of regretting what she thought was good and she did not get.

The Universe knows better than Pauline what is good for her because it has the whole picture and it is the source of all abundance. Humans have emotions that can create things only if those emotions are well selected and guided  towards a specific purpose.

Think positive, act positive and believe. Do all this with a burning desire and strong self confidence. Your burden is about to become light and your dream a reality.

See you next time

Makelightyourburden