Are Your Days Looking the Same?

I remember many years ago when I heard the news on Radio that I was one of a few students selected to pursue my studies at a high school, the “Christ-King College” as it was called, in the South of the country. I had worked hard for six years, was the first of my class and had passed the National Examination with great results. I had kept my exam number 30517 to make sure no other kid would use it.

What excitement! I knew I was different. I knew I had an opportunity to become even more different and make a difference in the World. I celebrated that day with a “dance on a banana leaf”, a sign of greatest joy.  So I left the village for the new school. There, the Latin course challenged me and I became worried that I would be sent back to the village without my certificate. Then everything became normal again. I prayed so hard and worked very hard for it. When I got it 7 years later, I celebrated the entire day and the next day was boring.

I went to University, studied days and nights to get my Masters Degree in Languages. I got it after 7 more years, celebrated and forgot as soon as friends left my home that evening. It was time to find a job of my dream and I needed to think. I found a job as a Radio and TV Producer. I celebrated and forgot. Tell me my friend: what was wrong with me? Those days full of extreme joy, happiness, can I claim them back today? Can I rewind the tape of life?

To find out if you are not like me, try the following exercise by Jeff Haden.

Jeff Haden, LinkedIn-Pick an awesome first day: The first day you started a new job, opened a business, bought a new house, landed a huge customer, met your significant other…

Pick a first day when you felt incredibly excited. Pick a day when everything felt new and filled with promise and hope and potential and anticipation. Pick a day that truly felt like the start of a better, happier, and more fulfilling life.

Now remember how you felt that day. Bask in the glow of that memory. I’ll wait.

Done?

Now think about how you feel today.

Ouch. I’m guessing those wonderful feelings just disappeared. Today probably feels the same as yesterday, and tomorrow seems like just one more of a seemingly endless string of similar days stretching off into the distance.

What changed? You changed. You adapted.

But don’t feel bad. Adaptation is natural. When something good happens you feel happier for a while. Then you adapt to your new situation and return to your baseline “happy state.”

Buy a Porsche and for a little while you feel happier (and maybe a little smug)… but soon that new Porsche is just your same old car. Buy a new house and for a while you’re happier… but soon you adapt and your new house is just your same old house.

But wait! What if you bought a Lamborghini? Hey, now that would make you happy. And what if you bought a new house on the golf course… hey, now that would be awesome.

For a while.

We all naturally revise our expectations upwards, and when our expectations go up our level of happiness goes back down.

Research shows that where vacations are concerned the biggest boost in happiness comes from planning the vacation: Vacation anticipation boosts happiness for an average of eight weeks.

After the vacation, though, happiness levels quickly drop to baseline levels, typically within days. Soon the people who went on vacation aren’t any happier than the people who did not.

So do this: Think back to the first day you chose. Say it’s the day you opened your own business. You were excited and thrilled because finally — finally! — you got to start calling your own shots. For the first time in your life your professional success – and income – would only be capped by your skills, creativity, and work ethic.

Now think about today. Nothing has really changed. You still call your own shots. Your professional success is still only limited by your skills, creativity, and work ethic. You still don’t have a boss, still get to do what you love, still get to take chances and seize opportunities and work with people you enjoy.

Nothing has changed… except you. In reality, today is just like that first day.

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