Gratitude, a secret for success

When I was about seven months old, my parents broke up. My mother would attempt to take me with her and I would fall very sick. She then thought it would be a better idea to leave me with my grandma. Grandma was a very reserved old lady. I have never heard her complain about anything. She never argued with anybody. She was quietly doing the farming and taking care of her family, friends and everyone who would come closer to her.

With her, I had enough to eat after a long day at school. She could stop eating so that I may find something for my stomach. More often I would even refuse to eat to make her sad. She then would keep the food in a place I would be able to access it the next morning. She washed my body so many times. She was my doctor when I was sick. She was my teacher at home and in the evening, before I went to bed, she told me stories. Those stories has always a lesson: thought or an attitude for success in life. She taught me that the best success is the one conquered in humility, humanity and love. She told me that a victory in brutality never last. I never realized how much she loved me and had suffered until the very last moment.

One night, as my grandpa was reprimanding me for making noise, grandma, from her perched bed, address her husband in these terms: “I feel that my time has come now. Is this the way you are going to stay with these children?” There was no answer.

The next morning, grand pa woke me up in a shaking voice. He said: “go tell my daughter Odette that her mother has passed away.” I felt bad because she died when I was only in elementary school. I wanted her to stay on this earth longer, until I could gain enough awareness to say “thank you” or to say “sorry” to her. I wanted her to live longer until I had a job and some money to buy her a gift. Today, I am taking care of her daughters, hoping that she too can see this and be happy, from wherever she is. If you still have a mother or a grandmother, you are lucky. Start realizing this before it is too late. Be grateful for what they have done for you. Ask for forgiveness for the wrong you did to them. Help them, make their burden lighter. I do the same for my mom but for grandma, I can only pray.

Here is another story for you.

“One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company. He passed the first interview, the director did the last interview, made the last decision. The director discovered from the CV that the youth’s academic achievements were excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never had a year when he did not score.
The director asked, “Did you obtain any scholarships in school?” the youth answered “none”. The director asked, “Was it your father who paid for your school fees?” The youth answered, “My father passed away when I was one year old, it was my mother who paid for my school fees.

The director asked, “Where did your mother work?” The youth answered, “My mother worked as a clothes cleaner. The director requested the youth to show his hands. The youth showed a pair of hands that were smooth and perfect. The director asked, “Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?” The youth answered, “Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books. Furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me.
The director said, “I have a request. When you go back today, go and clean your mother’s hands, and then see me tomorrow morning. The youth felt that his chance of landing the job was high. When he went back, he happily requested his mother to let him clean her hands. His mother felt strange, happy but with mixed feelings, she showed her hands to her child. The youth cleaned his mother’s hands slowly. His tears fell as he did that. It was the first time he noticed that his mother’s hands were so wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful that his mother shivered when they

were cleaned with water. This was the first time the youth realized that it was this pair of hands that washed the clothes every day to enable him to pay the school fees. The bruises in the mother’s hands were the price that the mother had to pay for his graduations, academic excellence and his future.
After finishing the cleaning of his mother’s hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his mother. That night, mother and son talked for a very long time. Next morning, the youth went to the director’s office. The Director noticed the tears in the youth’s eyes, asked: “can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?” The youth answered,” I cleaned my mother’s hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes. The Director asked, “please tell me your feelings.” The youth said, Number 1, I know now what appreciation is. Without my mother, there would not be the successful me today. Number 2, by working together and helping my mother, I only now realized how difficult and tough it is to get something done. Number 3, I have come to appreciate the importance and value of family relationship.
The director said, “This is what I am looking for to be my manager. I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the sufferings of others to get things done, and a person who would not put money as his only goal in life. You are hired. Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates. Every employee worked diligently as a team. The company’s performance improved tremendously. A child, who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wanted, would develop “entitlement mentality” and would always put himself first. He would be ignorant of his parent’s efforts. When he starts work, he assumes that every person must listen to him, and when he becomes a manager, he would never know the sufferings of his employees and would always blame others. For this kind of people, who may be good academically, may be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel sense of achievement. He will grumble and be full of hatred and fight for more.

If we are this kind of protective parents, are we really showing love or are we destroying our child instead? You can let your children live in a big house, eat a good meal, learn piano, watch a big screen TV. But when you are cutting grass, please let them experience it. After a meal, let them wash their plates and bowls together with their brothers and sisters. It is not because you do not have money to hire a

Maid or helper, but it is because you want to love them in a right way. You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will grow gray, same as the mother of that young person. The most important thing is your child learns how to appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learns the ability to work with others to get things done.